You know you’re getting a lot of snow when…

5. It starts thundering. I was working in an office building in Minnesota the first time I experienced simultaneous thunder, lightening, and snow, and I tell you, for this East Coast kid, thundersnow is a weird anomaly that belongs only in a SciFi movie.

4. The power goes out because the snow is too heavy for the lines. I remember last May when it snowed 18 inches here, and my friend Dawn had no electricity for two days. She made homemade Mac ‘n Cheese on her grill and fed all the people who came in from the cold to stay at her house. Leave it to Dawn…

3. You can’t differentiate between snow bank and snow-covered garbage can. Numerous times, my neighbor has helped me dig out my garbage container when it gets buried by the plow. It’s an experience, though, to dig shoulder-level with the shovel, hoping to hit something.

2. Your house starts making weird cracking noises. Earlier today, I heard a loud crunch that sounded as if the front door had fallen off into the snow. I ran downstairs but nothing visible had happened. So far, the house is intact. But it’s groaning. And this thing is only getting started.

1. When you have to exit the front door, round to the back door, shovel to uncover the back door, then take a screwdriver and a hammer and chisel the ice under the back door, then repeat these steps for four days until the back door opens again–just as today’s blizzard was about to hit.

So far, today’s snowpocalypse includes heavy snow, blinding snow, hurl-down-an-inch-per-hour snow, thundersnow… The wind will pick up soon and them it will get worse. At least we didn’t get the freezing rain they predicted here before the snow, or the tornadoes. But the power just went out. Only 15 more hours of snow to go!

If you have power, check out my first book on Amazon.