photoAs the blizzard leaves us in its wake and we begin to start the cleanup process, my mind is prone to wandering. As it does so often with this weather, it wanders either to the beach or to the clouds. Today it’s clouds. Here’s a bit of fantasy prose I call The Grabians. It all started with an unreplied email…

The Grabians

Okay, I was going to write you back…but then:

A giant spaceship landed and a green (because that’s a dashing color) alien jumped out and told me that I had to go with him to planet Grabian for a pool tournament that’s only held once every quarter century and a half.

I protested, saying that I had to write an email to my buddy Patrick, but you just can’t reason with these Grabians, not when victory is on the line.

Not much of a pool player myself, we had to detour the spaceship to Bob’s Pool Lessons, “Sticks and Balls, We Teach It All” in Hoboken, New Jersey. Bob was unavailable on such short notice, but his former son, Bob Jr., offered his services.

By 4:20 p.m., Eastern Standard Time, I was shooting pool like one of those skinny women in a vest and tie on the cable channels.

My Grabian friend paid for the lesson since I forgot my purse back at work with your half-finished email. Bob Jr. sure was surprised to see that Grabian money looks an awful lot like New Jersey bus tokens.

Well, we were off again in the ship, and made it right in time to begin the annual quarter century and a half Grabian tournament. Unfortunately, their gravity is different than ours, but being a system analyst at WorldCom, I’m sure you know all about that.

It came down to the final shot, (doesn’t it always?) and lo and behold I was the only one left holding the stick. That made it was my turn, according to the Grabian Constitution. (Hey, they’re aliens, not barbarians.)

Taking all my new-found knowledge from the infamous Bob Jr., I shot the ball directly into the corner pocket for the win! I was crowned Queen of Grabian and given the keys to the city of Neldar, which I quickly gave back because they were toxic to human skin.

It was the greatest achievement of my life (sad, eh?) and I would have called you from the victory party but my cell phone was back at the office in my purse.

Phew! I only got back a couple minutes ago, and contrary to most alien abductions, I was gone for what seemed only a fraction of an hour, but it took nearly 4 whole days in Earth Time.

Sorry, buddy, it really was out of my control. A tournament junkie Grabian is not a creature to mess with during a crescent moon…


Stay safe out there, everyone. And check out UDK on Amazon when you get a free moment.